A glamorous 28-year-old businesswoman killed herself
because she struggled to cope with living alone in Britain with her family
dispersed across the world, an inquest heard yesterday.
Sales manager Sharon Bukokhe, of Levenshulme,
Manchester, was a high achiever working for a family planning charity but felt
lonely because relatives including her husband lived abroad.
Mrs. Bukokhe, who was originally from Kenya, used
her laptop to research ways to commit suicide, applied full make up and painted
her nails then suffocated herself at her flat in April.
A diary found after her death said:
‘I think that any life is as valid as the next, such
that an ending of 25 is as good as 88. I have no real regrets or fears any
more, I just feel decisive and justified.’
Mrs. Bukokhe, who appeared to friends to be ‘the
happiest person in the world’, settled in the UK in 2002 and graduated in
design and engineering at Nottingham Trent University, the inquest heard. She
was later appointed sales manager of a charity helping with family planning
issues involving third world countries. But Mrs. Bukokhe was deeply affected by
her family living in other countries.
Her husband lived in South Africa so he could
complete a Master’s Degree whilst her mother lived in Richmond, Virginia, in
the US, and her sister lived in Canada.
Her only relative in Britain was her brother who
lived 250 miles away in Gillingham, Kent and as a result of her feelings of
loneliness she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder.
Well, I don’t see this as enough reason why she
should take her own life! Continue after the cut…
Mrs Bukokhe’s Sister Caroline Lusiche, who flew in
from Canada to be at the inquest in Manchester said: ‘There were many factors
which led to it.
'I think that
any life is as valid as the next, such that an ending of 25 is as good as 88. I
have no real regrets or fears any more, I just feel decisive and justified'
‘She was a high achiever; her marriage was also a
big factor. She wanted it to succeed but he was in South Africa doing his
masters. She moved and they decided to put that marriage on hold.
‘She had come here as a very young girl and it
really affected her that we were all dispersed in different countries. In the
last few days we had been trying to get back in touch with each other.
‘But because of the time difference- me in Canada -
we kept missing each other. I sent her an email and did not hear back then I
heard.
‘She was trying to be the one to bring the family together;
she had a lot on her shoulders weighing on her. She had high objectives we were
taught to hold our chin up and get on with it. ‘She tried to persevere she
wanted to do that to protect your feelings - she didn’t want to make you feel
bad.’
Mrs. Bukokhe’s flat mate of two years, Stefanie
Maccalli, told the hearing: ‘She was a really artistic, creative person, very
active - and I think everybody who didn’t know her particularly well found her
the happiest person in the world.
‘I would say the creative and joy and artistic side
was real but the happiness she was showing all the time was not always real.
There were times when she was not this happy, outgoing person.
'The two years I knew her where divided into a two
periods, the first she was taking medication for the bipolar and she was always
very happy.
‘In the second part she changed the amount of
medication. She would have ups and downs every few weeks. When low she would
not like to talk too much and would take a day off work and stay in her room
and watch movies.
‘We tried to open the door it wouldn’t open - it was
obvious that it was closed from the inside. We decided to try and break the
door, we looked inside and she was on the floor in front of the door.
‘She was dressed with make-up and her nails done,
she looked like she had been somewhere nice or she was just going somewhere.’
'When I found
out it shocked me very much. She always put a brave face on; she said she did
feel very lonely 'Dr Javaid Khan, Mrs Bukokhe's doctor
The inquest was told Mrs. Bukokhe had last seen her
doctor, Dr Javaid Khan, in March this year.
He told the inquest that she had stopped taking her
medication in January, and said she was feeling low and her sleep was variable
and she had a lack of motivation.
Dr Khan said: ‘She was having suicidal thoughts but
she could put them aside. She was not a severe type of manic depression; there
was a low assessment of suicide.
‘When I found out it shocked me very much. She
always put a brave face on; she said she did feel very lonely.’
Recording a verdict of suicide, Deputy Coroner for
Manchester Carolyn Singleton said: ‘I’m sure that Sharon intended to kill
herself.’ Well, its a pity!
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